重庆婚俗:媒人三次去女方家求婚是什么结果?

 
重庆婚俗:媒人三次去女方家求婚是什么结果?
 
 
第二次求婚若是女方收下了礼物,当男方再次备置礼物,请 媒人第三次去女方家求婚时,女方就会表明态度,答应这门亲 事,同意开亲,并表现出一种热情款待的气氛,讲一些情深义重 的话,如“你为儿女的好事,腿都跑长了!” “不开亲是两家,开 了亲就是一家了!” “也莫害你再跑路了,女儿横竖是人家的人, 找了婆家,我们也就放心了。”这时,女方把直系亲属的长辈接 到家中,征求他们的意见,以便决定是否“放话”(即答应媒人 为某家求喜的意思,也就是许婚)。当全家老少和族内长辈都同 意许婚时,媒人将事先带在身上的鞭炮取出来,一边对女方老少 表示谢意,一边点燃炮竹在堂屋里放,这谓之“放炮火”。这是 庆贺男方求喜获允,宣告成功,同时庆贺女方姑娘许婚别人,找 到婆家,故以燃放炮火来向族内族外宣告儿女大事。这种求婚以 伞为象征,以礼物作凭证,以放炮火为许婚等方式,具有重庆人 为人爽直的独特品质和重庆婚俗的礼义风格。长期如此,约定俗 成。这样,男方、女方和媒人都通情达理,不失礼义,做到人和 义和,友好相处。
 
有的地方,父母同意将女儿许婚了,媒人还要去征求同姓家族的 意见,这谓之“求百家”。媒人亲自到各家各户去登门,家家问到,表示 尊重。这也是“田是私田,女是众女”(谐音雨是众雨)的风习之规。

 
Chongqing wedding custom: what is the result of the matchmaker's three times going to the wife's house to propose? The second marriage proposal if the woman accepted the gift, when the man again prepared the gift and invited the matchmaker to propose at the woman's house for the third time, the woman would show her attitude by agreeing to the marriage, and showing an atmosphere of warm hospitality. Say some sincere words, such as "you are good for your children, the legs are long!" "if you don't open a kiss, you will have two. If you open a kiss, you will have one!" "Don't hurt you to run any longer. Our daughter is someone else's, and we'll be relieved if she finds her husband's home." At this time, the woman took the elders of her immediate family to her home and asked them for their advice in order to decide whether to "talk" (that is, to allow the matchmaker to beg for a family, that is, to allow marriage). When the whole family, old and young, and their elders all agreed to marry, the matchmaker took out the firecrackers he had brought on his body in advance, while expressing gratitude to the young and old of the woman, and setting the firecrackers on fire in the hall house. This was called "firing fire." This is to celebrate the success of the man's request, and at the same time to celebrate the girl's permission to marry someone else, to find her husband's home, so he set off artillery fire to declare his children's affairs to the people inside and outside the clan. This marriage proposal is symbolized by umbrella, with gifts as proof, and with fire as a permit for marriage. It has the unique character of Chongqing people and the etiquette and righteousness style of Chongqing marriage customs. For a long time, the convention became vulgar. In this way, the man, the woman and the matchmaker are reasonable, polite, and friendly. In some places, parents agree to marry their daughter, and matchmakers ask for advice from their family. The matchmaker went to the house and asked, showing respect. This is also the "field is private field, female is the daughter" (homophonic rain is the rain) wind custom.
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